Dinner at Mary and Martha’s – Saying “Yes, and…” to Jesus Week 3 (Luke 10: 38 – 42)
In the book God, Improv, and the Art of Living, author MaryAnn McKibben writes, “Any situation in which we find ourselves is an opportunity to Yes-And. God’s loving nature is unchanging, focusing on the best Yes, the deepest wholeness. But God’s actions are multivalent; there may be many possible paths to accomplish God’s ends.” This quote illustrates that following Jesus, living a life of faith -even if we are doing it with an improvisational spirit- requires some discernment. When we look at the world this way there may seem to be endless opportunities for us to say Yes and respond to God’s call on our life, but we may still wrestle with the idea that we are not making the right choice, or responding in the right way.
This struggle and this discernment happen no matter how we view God and our relationship with God. If you view God as an omnipotent, all-knowing deity with a master plan that guides and structures all life we must still discern where we think we fit in this plan and what God may want from us next. If you believe in a God that is more improvisational, a God that has no master plan but is still always creatively at work in the world trying to find a way toward deep wholeness and the thriving of creation there would still need to be discernment about what the next right thing is. There just might be more possibilities if you believe God is open to such things and does not have a plan already laid out. And that is the risk of doing anything improvisationally. It risks making mistakes or choosing wrong, without the safety net of a plan to catch us and set us back on our feet, pointed in the right direction. Is this a risk when following Jesus, though? Well, when we believe in the unconditional and all-encompassing love of Christ, we know that our mistakes or wrong choices will not lead us to face rejection. However, as we see in the Gospels, Jesus does have preferences, including about how people respond to him. We see one such example in our story today, from Luke 10: 38 – 42.
In this story, Jesus goes into the house of Martha, and her sister Mary, and we see two examples of how to follow Jesus. Two sisters who make different choices when they decide to say Yes to Jesus. Martha has already said Yes by inviting Jesus and his followers into home and providing a meal for them. The fact that Martha can offer this is unique and significant. There were not many women of her time who owned a home and had the means to feed a group of people. But she is just one of several women reported throughout Luke’s writings, in his Gospel and then in the book of Acts, who have had the means and the willingness to support the ministry of Jesus and, later, his apostles. So, what Martha offers here is certainly an important brick that supports Christ’s ministry and begins to lay the foundations of what will become the church.
Also, in this story we meet Martha’s sister Mary. Mary also says Yes to Jesus, and the way she decides to do that is by listening to him speak. The brick she lays down is her presence seated before Jesus listening to his teachings. Now, what Mary is doing is also unique, and that she is allowed to do it is significant. Sitting at the feet of a teacher such as Jesus was not the sort of thing women were allowed to do. This was the place of men, traditionally. Yet here was Mary, seated at Jesus’ feet, taking in every word. And it did not go unnoticed. However, as the Gospel tells us, it was not one of the men who came to complain to Jesus, it was a woman, Mary’s own sister, Martha. She has been playing the part of hostess this whole time – cooking and cleaning and taking care of her guests- and all she really wants is some help. So, she goes to Jesus to point out that her sister’s place is not in the other room listening to Jesus, but with Martha taking care of the household.
Jesus does not agree. Jesus takes Mary’s side, and points out that the choice she has made is “the better part.” The Bible doesn’t tell us Martha’s response to this, but I can’t imagine she is happy, or appreciative, at these words. She has been working hard, doing the right thing, the things she believes are her responsibility and her calling to do. She has said Yes in what she thinks is the best, most faithful way, and Jesus responds by saying, “You should be more like your sister.” What? What is he trying to say?
Well, lets take a look. While Martha was busying herself with the housework and the needs of her guests, Mary was sitting and listening to Jesus, and the importance of listening to our life of faith should not be underestimated. For one thing, listening is an important way to show we care. To give something or someone our attention in this way is a way of showing that we appreciate and value that person or activity. Listening is also an important part of improvisation. We can not respond with a Yes or an And if we have not listened and heard what the other person is saying. It is a common pitfall in performing improv. I recall being in class, not listening to what my scene partner was saying because I was too busy thinking about what I was going to say next. Maybe I had already decided and I was just waiting for them to finish talking, hoping that they would say something to set me up to deliver the punch line. Perhaps you have had similar situations in your everyday conversations. Not really listening, just waiting for your turn to talk. Or perhaps like Martha, we just get too busy to listen properly. So, that is why Jesus shows a preference to Mary’s actions. By sitting and listening Mary is acknowledging that what is truly important to her -and to all of us that have the opportunity to read, hear, and study the Word- is Jesus’ teachings. Jesus knows that what we put our attention on is what will grow and spread, and so Jesus encourages us to be like Mary and put our attention his Good News.
However, I don’t want us to pile on Martha here, so we should also note that Jesus is not saying that what Martha is doing is unimportant. Certainly not. After all, look at what Jesus has done in this story. He has entered the house of a woman, and he has let another woman sit at his feet (with the men) and listen to his teaching. Remember Jesus is also improvisational, so the Yes, And that he is offering in this story is to lift up and make space for women. He is showing us that, even in the patriarchal society of his time, there is a place for women in his community and in the world to come, the new life he has promised. And it is a place that will not be subservient to men. Now, look at the other gospel stories of Yes And living we have heard so far. The sinful woman, rejected by her community, who came to anoint Jesus’ feet, and was forgiven. Zacchaeus, the hated tax collector, who found Jesus and then Jesus went into his home. Every time Jesus says Yes And he is making more space for people. Making space for a sinful woman, making space for tax collector, making space for two sisters who are unmarried and live alone. So, we should not overlook that this is what Martha was doing. Making space in her home for Jesus and those who followed him. Its just that unlike Mary, she was not able to focus on Christ once he was there, as she got caught up and distracted by other things – like the work she had to do, how tired she was, and even, her frustration that her sister was not conforming to the typical gender roles of that time.
Martha’s attitude in that moment is not a Yes And attitude. She is approaching Jesus with a Yes But attitude. As in Yes Jesus you are welcome into my home, but I do not have time to sit and listen to you because I have so many tasks to do. Yes, Jesus, I love you and want to follow you, as my sister does, but it isn’t my place as a woman to sit before you. And while we are at it can you make my sister come and help me, instead of sitting there listening to you?
How often is the church more like Martha than Mary? How often do we caught up in the distractions. In the sorts of things Martha was being distracted by. Things like building maintenance, or budget spreadsheets, or who is skipping church that Sunday, or even shrinking membership rolls and how we are going to grow them. Certainly, these are all worthwhile endeavors. These are things that can and do contribute to the mission of the church, to do the things Christ tells us are important. Things like “making disciples” and caring for the “least of these.” They can be distracting, though. And we can soon find ourselves with our thoughts focused on things that are not quite spiritual or missional concerns. Do we have enough money? Where have all the people gone? If I do that, will it make someone mad? Why don’t people appreciate me more for all the things I’m doing?
This week I read this quote in a book, it is attributed to man named Herbert Nelson, who works for the Presbyterian Church (USA). The quote reads, “Transformative change requires a significant spiritual investment. It also requires a divestment of self-interest.” This quote was used in the context of advocating for the need for transformative change in our churches and their missions. So, what would it mean to divest of self-interest? Divestment being the opposite of investment, usually used to describe the withholding of financial supports for corporations or other entities, especially when they are involved in unethical or unjust activities. Churches and religious organizations practice this kind of divestment all the time. Making sure their money does not go to support something that does not align with their beliefs or priorities. What would it look like, then, for the church to divest of self-interest?
Well, we can look again to the example of Martha to give us a clue. Martha could divest of her self-interest by letting go of the distractions Jesus warns her about. She could let go of her feelings of anger and frustration towards her situation. I’m not saying she should just let go of her anger and frustration and be happy. Anger and frustration are emotions, and it is good and right to feel our emotions when they occur. They become distractions and problems, when we try so hard to justify them and hold on to them, often by focusing them on something outside of ourselves. In Martha’s case, this meant focusing her anger and frustration on Mary and what Mary was doing. Even going so far as to blame her because she was not conforming to her societal role as a woman. Certainly, it would be helpful to divest of that sort of thinking.
Letting go of this type of thinking is something that the church needs to do as well. Part of what the church can do to divest of self-interest include letting go of our need to justify and hold on to our collective troubling emotions. There is concern and even fear about the state of the church these days. Church membership and participation is down all over. People view institutional religion differently then they did 60 years ago. The church does not have the cultural or social influence that it has had in the past. And its okay, if this scares us or confuses us or frustrates us. What we shouldn’t do is take those emotions and stoke them like a fire by putting blame on external things. Blaming sports on Sunday mornings. Blaming younger generations for not caring enough. Blaming cultural influences for making society so secular. Blaming women and minorities and the LGBTQIA community and the poor for not knowing their place.
Or, even if we have good intentions, these emotions could lead those of us in the church to simply focus and become distracted by the feeling that we need to do more. We see that the church is not what it once was, and so we feel the need to do more and more to build it back up. We become very focused on what we feel is lacking. To divest of self-interest is to divest of the feeling that we need special attention because we are uniquely lacking or uniquely in trouble. To divest of self-interest can take our attention away from what we feel is lacking and open us up to be aware of the abundance God has blessed us with.
So, we turn our attention to spiritual investment. Saying Yes And to Jesus can be the first step in this process. As we have seen in this story when Jesus says Yes And he is making room for us, especially those who would listen, who would make that spiritual investment like Mary is doing. So, if we are listening to Jesus -which is our way of saying Yes- our And should be to make space for other people. Listen as Mary did, but also have hospitality and a heart for service as Martha did. This is the Yes And the church is called to. A spiritual investment that involves caring for God’s creation, and allowing this to take our attention away from the distractions of self-interest and putting our focus on listening and discerning Christ’s ever-present call in our always evolving world.
Amen.