Connect to Joy – Third Sunday in Advent (Luke 1: 39-45)
In literary and film criticism there is something called the Bechdel Test. The idea is, if a work of fiction has a scene that includes two women, and the audience knows their name, and they are talking with one another about something other than a man, then it passes the test. This so-called test is meant to measure the representation of women in works of narrative fiction. So, if the female characters are named, and they have something to talk about besides the male protagonist then that is the base line for a representation of more well-rounded female characters. Its also a very low bar to clear.
The Bible, of course, is dominated by male characters. However, it also includes many important female characters. And when these female characters show up, they often have more to offer then their relationship and usefulness to the male characters. Think of Bathsheba, who first appears as an object of King David’s desire, but later emerges as major player in the politics of the kingdom, moving herself and her son Solomon into a place of power. Or, think about the book of Ruth. The story of the book of Ruth focuses on the relationship between Ruth and her mother-in-law, Naomi, and how they helped and supported each other as they made their way in life in a difficult time.
Then, we have Mary and Elizabeth, the cousins who meet with each other in today’s scripture reading. Do they meet to talk about Elizabeth’s husband Zechariah and what a pain he’s been since he lost the ability to speak? No. Do they talk about Mary’s intended husband, Joseph, and how unsupportive he’s been since learning about her pregnancy? No. They clear that low bar that is the Bechdel Test. What they talk about is words of encouragement for each other and hope for the world that they and the children they carry will help to provide for the world. Beyond simply being a representation of two women in ancient Israel, they are also a representation of the joy that is found in the fulfillment of God’s promises and in relationship with others. Indeed, we connect to joy more easily when we are grounded in our relationships, including our relationship with God.
We see these dynamics play out in this story from Luke. The first thing Mary does after she receives the news that she will become pregnant with the Son of God is go to Elizabeth. She rushes off to share the good news with someone. When you receive good news isn’t it a sign of how joyful you feel about it when you feel compelled to share it? Who is that person that you call first when you receive joyful news? For Mary, it is her cousin, Elizabeth. This is just one way in which the joy of this moment is manifested in their relationship.
Elizabeth also receives this news with joy. When Mary tells her that she is pregnant, Elizabeth acknowledges this by saying that Mary and her child are blessed. She does not look at Mary funny and ask, “Wait. How did you get pregnant?” She does not question whether Joseph is the baby’s father. She does not scold Mary for getting pregnant outside of marriage and ruining her future prospects because no man would marry her now. No. Instead she declares this news a blessing. Not only that, but she reveals that she knows that this child Mary is carrying is to be the Messiah. In fact, the only question Elizabeth asks is, “why.” As in, “Why am I so favored, that the mother of the Messiah should come visit me?” There is certainly joy to be found in such a mutual, supportive relationship.
As special as it is, Mary and Elizabeth’s relationship is not the only one represented in this story. It is not the only example of joy in relationship. How did Elizabeth know that Mary was the mother of the Messiah? Well, Elizabeth was also pregnant at this time, with John. And when she heard Mary’s good news, the baby within Elizabeth leapt for joy. This indicates for us that even at this stage, there is a relationship between Jesus and John the Baptist. Even from his mother’s womb, John will proclaim the coming of the Messiah, he will identify Christ as the fulfillment of God’s promise to the people. And John the baby delivers this news with joy at Christ’s arrival.
Which leads us to the third relationship present in this story: the relationship with God. Specifically, the relationship between Mary and God, but also there is quite a bit here about the relationship between God and the people. Mary is very mindful of her relationship with God and God’s relationship to the people. We see this when Elizabeth comments that Mary is blessed because she trusted God, she “believed that what God said to her would be accomplished.” Mary expresses this in the next verses of the Gospel, verses 46-55, which are know as The Magnificat. In that song, also known as a canticle, Mary shares her joy with Elizabeth, and us. Joy found in the God’s Good News that will be revealed through the birth of Jesus. She shares her joy that in the birth of Jesus we get a glimpse of the kind of relationship God seeks to have with the people. It is a faithful relationship where promises are kept, verse 50, “your mercy reaches from age to age,” and care and justice are provided for those in need. Verse 53, “You have filled the hungry with good things, while you have sent the rich away empty.” Mary’s song also talks about the whole community sharing in the blessings of God. Verse 54 and 55, “You have come to the aid of Israel your servant, mindful of your mercy – the promise you made to our ancestors- to Sarah and Abraham and their descendants forever.”
In Mary we see the joy that is to be found in relationships. We see the joy in the expectancy of a new mother looking forward to the birth of her child, and what that relationship will be. We see a young woman who wants to share in the joys of her life with a cousin that she loves, even though her cousin is much older. We see in Mary someone who finds joy in the fulfillment of God’s promises. And the baby she delivers, Jesus, will go on to provide more joy, because in the Gospel of Luke, the ministry of Jesus is full of joy found in relationship. Jesus’ work involves things like forgiveness, healing the sick, raising the dead, and receiving the outcasts with love.
These relationships lay out the path to joy, but it is also important to remember that we should be mindful of the relationships we have and pursue. We stay mindful in this way so that our relationships can become and remain fertile ground for joy in our life. We can do this by honoring one another. The ground of our relationships become inhospitable to joy when they become wrapped up in self-concern. When our attention turns to what we want to get out of a relationship, rather than what we can give. And what we can give might simply be our presence and our openness to what the other person is bringing to the table. Consider again the example of Elizabeth. She welcomed Mary into her home, blessed her, encouraged her, and received what she had to say with blessings rather than judgement. She let Mary have all the attention she needed, even though Elizabeth would have been justified in trying to get some of the spotlight for herself. After all, she was also going through an unexpected and miraculous pregnancy. The news of her child was also delivered by an angel and destined for a prominent role in the story of salvation. And yet, she didn’t say, “But what about me?” She said, “Blessed are you…and blessed is the fruit of your womb.” Elizabeth welcomed Mary with openness, not judgement, creating the possibility that there could be more to this relationship.
In a way, our path to joy must also pass the Bechdel Test. Joy -especially joy found in relationship- is experienced when we can look at the whole, grounded, represented person or experience. If we merely use people or experiences, we do not find true joy. Objectification of the other does not lead to joy. Making someone the object of our emotions, whether that be love, or anger, or desire, or fear, disconnects us from our own emotions by focusing on someone else.
The utility of something or someone does not bring true joy, either. People can have skills or qualities that are useful to us, but that doesn’t mean our interactions are fertile ground for joy. You might go into the coffee shop, really excited to get you favorite warm beverage, and you thank the barista who makes it for you. However, there is no opportunity for joy if we only see that person through the lens of what they can do for us.
Opposition to something is another type of relationship that does not bring joy. In fact, these are ways to fracture relationships, and to make us disconnected from joy. Opposing something is just a first step, it may even be the right thing to do -as is the case with something like violence against marginalized groups or discriminatory laws- but the fullness of that cause is not represented until we can say something is wrong AND begin to imagine a better way. That is where I believe the joy comes in.
Joy is found in relationship when we realize that the other has much to offer, on their own merits and having nothing to do with us. They may not be the main character of your story -that would be you- but they can still be fully realized on their own. They are still a revelation and the beloved of God. So, we can connect to joy when we recognize that God’s love is represented in the lives of all God’s creations. When we connect to God’s creation with openness to possibility and love for the other, we connect to joy.
So, as we look to find the joy this holiday season, I suggest that we first look for it in places of connection with others. I then wonder if maybe, when looking for that joy in relationship, we might run those interactions through our own test. Let Mary and Elizabeth be our model. Ask yourself, “Where is my relationship with God represented in my relationship with this person?” Maybe, like Mary there are people that you just want to share your joy with, and like Mary that joy comes from a belief that God is faithfully with you in all things. Or maybe, like Elizabeth, there are people who you want to call blessed and give thanks for. Is it because you see God’s promise of love and hope for the well-being of creation, fulfilled in your life through that person? Or think of the relationships you have in which you put the needs of others above your own. That instinct comes from God. So, these are all signs that we have passed the test, and that our relationships are blessed, with God as the foundation, making them representational of joy. The joy that touches us all with the birth of the Christ child.
Amen.